


The One Time He Did

by orphan_account



Series: Supernatural Gabriel Bingo '19 Round One [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: 5 Times, Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Gabriel Lives (Supernatural: Exodus), Gabriel Needs a Hug (Supernatural), Heaven, Hugs, Other, Post-Episode: s05e08 Changing Channels, Post-Episode: s13e17 The Thing, Post-Episode: s13e22 Exodus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23841382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Timestamps along Gabriel's life about the five times he wanted affection and the one time he did ask.Square Used: FAV. TROPE
Relationships: Balthazar & Gabriel (Supernatural), Castiel & Gabriel (Supernatural), Gabriel & Dean Winchester, Gabriel & Sam Winchester
Series: Supernatural Gabriel Bingo '19 Round One [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1717402
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	The One Time He Did

**Author's Note:**

> Serious Angst. Like I just pulled the pin on an angst grenade and threw it at you. 
> 
> I hope you like it.

**********

**ONE**

**********

“Hi.” Gabriel waved at his older brothers. He was stuck in a tree in the Garden. He had tried to fly on his own but his wings were too small and weak. He sulked as Michael and Raphael debated on how to get him unstuck. 

Lucifer flew up to him. He perched on the branch next to him. “Hey, Gabriel. How did you get up here?” 

“I want to fly! Michael says I’m too little and that I’m not allowed to. I snuck off and tried to fly. I jumped off that cliff over there but I landed here and now I can’t get down.” Gabriel crossed his arms as his wings fluttered in anger. 

“Hmmm.” Lucifer hummed. He poked at Gabriel, trying to determine where he was stuck at. 

“Stop!” Gabriel giggled. “Stop! That tickles!” Gabriel was wiggling around too much. He slipped from the branch too quickly for Lucifer to catch him. “Help!” 

There was a big rush of wind and Gabriel was caught in his older brother’s arms. “Gotcha Gabriel.” 

Gabriel sucked in big gulps of breath as his brother carried him down to the ground. 

“Gabriel. You know better than that.” Michael scolded. 

Gabriel bowed his head. A tear slipped down his cheek. He just wanted to fly! Falling was terrifying. Gabriel wanted to ask for some comfort but he knew his brothers would deny him. 

“I’m fine, Raphael.” Gabriel shoved his brother’s hands away and ran off through the garden. 

  
  
  


**************

**TWO**

**************

“Stop it!” Gabriel yelled. “Stop fighting!” 

Ever since they had put The Darkness away, Lucifer had been getting mean. Arguing with Michael and picking on Raphael and Gabriel. It got worse and worse until it was an all-out brawl between them. 

“Stay out of this Gabriel.” Lucifer sneered. “Wouldn’t want to hurt you and make you cry again.” 

Gabriel ran out of the room. He ran until he found his tree. It was a weeping willow with soft grass under its branches. Gabriel was small enough that he could hide underneath it and not be seen. 

Gabriel crawled under the growth and froze at what he saw. Two little seraphs were curled up in his spot. A small black-winged angel was tucked under larger silver wings. Both had tear streaks down their faces. Gabriel scooted back but the silver winged angel’s eyes snapped open. Ice blue eyes stared at him in warning before the little angel recognized him. 

“Gabriel,” Balthazar whispered. “Are they still fighting? Cassie and I don’t like it when they do.” 

Gabriel came close to his little brothers. “I’m sorry kiddos.” 

A whimper came from the black feathers. 

“Hey, Castiel.” Gabriel coaxed the little angel back to sleep. 

“Are you okay Gabriel?” Balthazar touched Gabriel’s cheek. His little hand came away wet. 

Gabriel swiped at his face. “I’m good Balthazar.” 

“Gabriel?” Castiel sat up with a sad frown. “I don’t like fighting. I wish I can just run away.” 

“Be strong little bros. It will be over soon.” Gabriel brushed some of Castiel’s feathers back into place. “Geez. You two’s wings are a mess. Get over here.” Gabriel pulled the giggling seraphs into his arms and tickled them until their happy shrieks could be heard. 

Gabriel watched the fighting get worse and worse. One day Castiel’s words rang in his head. Gabriel knew what he had to do. 

**************

**THREE**

***************

Gabriel sighed as he sat in his throne. He thought playing Loki would be fun but it was mostly meetings and gatherings. If he wanted that he would have stayed in Heaven. 

Gabriel watched a crow flying overhead. The black wings reminded him of Castiel. The last time he saw him under that weeping willow so long ago. 

“Are you okay Loki?” Freya asked. 

“I’m good. Just planning something.” Gabriel winked flirtatiously at the love goddess. “Something special.” 

Freya stared at him, unimpressed. “Something is up with you Loki. I am here if you want to talk.” 

“Nothing is wrong with me!” Gabriel jumped to his feet. “Leave me alone! What do you know? Nothing!” 

Gabriel stormed from the room. Gabriel entered his rooms and flung them shut with a bang. He fell to the floor and sobbed. He was all alone. He had no one. No one cared about him anymore. Gabriel was gone. It was time to embrace Loki. Gabriel was dead. He was Loki now. 

The storm raged outside as an archangel’s heart broke and became hardened. 

Gabriel stepped out of his room. His golden eyes were darker now and he became Loki. 

*************

**FOUR**

*************

“This is about you being too afraid to stand up to your family!” 

Dean Winchester’s words echoed around Gabriel’s head as he sat in a bar. A flutter of wings was heard and Gabriel was too slow to respond as someone grabbed him and dragged him to a park a few miles away. 

Gabriel spun around. “Who do you think-” Gabriel sighed. “Hey, Cassie.” 

Castiel was glaring at him. “It’s Castiel and you left us!” He hissed. “Balthazar and I mourned you every day since you ‘died’. And this is where I find you?” Castiel pushed his feelings through his grace and into Gabriel. 

Gabriel almost fell over at the emotions of hurt, anger, betrayal, and sadness. “Cassie I’m-” 

“It’s Castiel and don’t you dare say sorry!” Castiel flared his wings. 

Gabriel held back a sob. Everything was rushing back. He buried Gabriel so far under Loki that it hurt coming back to the surface. 

“I missed you. The fighting… it only got worse after you left.” Castiel sounded vulnerable. 

Gabriel stared at his hurting brother. “I’m sorry.” It was all he could say. 

“Help us. Please brother. There must be some way to stop all this.” Castiel pleaded. “You owe me that much.” 

Gabriel looked away from Castiel. “There might be a few people I can talk to. Give me a few weeks. This might take a while.” 

“Thank you, brother.” Castiel flew off with a brush of feathers together. 

Gabriel tried to hold it back. Everything hurt too much! It was too much! 

“This is about you being too afraid to stand up to your family!” 

“You’re right Dean. I am afraid and a coward. I’ll help but you will never see me again.” Gabriel swore. 

When he faked his death at the hotel he thought he was making the right decision. He had never been more wrong in his life. 

************

**FIVE**

***********

Gabriel huddled in on himself in the corner of the room. It was too much! Everything hurt! There was no more comfort for him. He was a screwup. A coward. Broken. 

Sam was talking. 

“And yeah sure, hookers in Monte Carlo, sounds great. But your family needs you. Jack, your nephew needs you. The world needs you. We need you. I need you.” 

Gabriel’s mind latched onto the one thing that would keep him going long enough to run away again. 

“Pornstars. They were pornstars Sam.” Gabriel’s voice sounded rough from disuse. 

Loki and everyone who did this to him will die. Revenge will help him. Gabriel didn’t know it but his eyes were glowing with grace as he felt such a strong hatred for the pagan who was once his friend. 

Sam left the room and Gabriel curled around himself. He wouldn’t cry. He would not cry. Archangels do not cry. 

Two tears fell down his cheeks. Damnit! More tears fell. Gabriel wished it was all over. He wanted it to be over. 

Gabriel flinched as he felt his torturers' entrance to Sam and Dean’s bunker. He cleaned his face hurriedly as two demons came in the room dragging him out and causing a massive flashback. 

************

**ONE**

************

“Go. I can buy some time.” Gabriel spoke to the Winchesters. 

“Gabriel. Don’t.” Sam pleaded. 

“All I did on earth was run. I’m not running anymore.” Over. I just want it to be over. 

Gabriel noticed the Winchesters just standing there. “Go!” 

“Not without you!” Sam yelled.

Gabriel pulled out his blade. His grace was weak. Over. He just wanted it to be over. Eternal sleep sounded like the best thing ever. 

Gabriel fought Michael putting on a show. When he saw the blade coming for him he didn’t fight it. 

“No!” A voice yelled. A rock was flung out of nowhere and smacked Michael in the face. While he was disoriented. Hands grabbed Gabriel and dragged him towards the portal. They fell through just as it closed. 

“No! Why did you do that?” Gabriel couldn’t keep all the hurt in anymore. 

“Gabriel?” Sam asked. 

Did Gabriel detect a hint of worry in his voice? 

“No!” Gabriel broke down crying. He fell to his knees. Loud shouts echoed around him before it all went quiet. 

“Gabriel? What can I do for you?” Sam’s gentle tone came closer. 

“Can I have- Never mind.” Gabriel bent over so his forehead touched the floor. Sobs shook his frame. 

“Gabriel, what do you need?” Dean’s voice came through the tears. 

Gabriel’s mind fixated on a small Castiel sitting in his lap playing with his feathers. Being piled under angels they flopped all over his wings and feeling loved. 

He pushed the question to Castiel. Low voices murmured before arms wrapped around his small vessel holding him together. Another pair came from the other side and one more set came around his middle. 

Gabriel fell apart and was put back together with the Winchesters' help. Maybe he had something to live for? 


End file.
